Category: Life

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Maintaining positive energy, gratitude, and optimism during a pandemic

Family is not an important thing, it's everything

\Well, 2020 sure has been something special, hasn’t it? This year has made a significant impact on just about everyone and its effects will be felt for many years to come. Regardless of the pandemic’s negative impact on my daily life and future plans, I’ve worked hard to remain as positive and optimistic as possible. I’ve tried to see the good in every situation, stay focused on what is important, and reject the negativity. Doing this hasn’t been easy and there have been lots of ups and downs. 

Our ability to have social interactions with family, friends, colleagues and my students hasn’t been the same since March. When I wrote my last blog post on April 1, I had no idea I’d be writing about “surviving” this pandemic at the end of November! And the most difficult part is having to accept the fact that it will be with us for quite a while longer. I remain hopeful that we will overcome the virus earlier than anticipated by the release of vaccines which have been showing great promise in their early stages. I do understand that these things take time and the vaccines aren’t a miracle cure. I know it will be a while until COVID-19 is truly a thing of the past.

The thing I miss most during this pandemic is interacting with people. I miss the daily face to face interaction with my colleagues and students at school and seeing people at meetings and conferences. I miss having all of my students in class together to learn and create beautiful music. I miss shaking hands, dishing out high fives, giving hugs, and being able to look people in the eye (and I don’t mean on Zoom, Google Meet, or Teams!). I also miss being able to do things in groups — attending gatherings, concerts, sporting events, etc.

I feel fortunate that I have been able to hang out with a small group of friends and family, but even that has been within a very limited capacity. I am grateful for the quarantined time I have with my family, and in an odd way, I hope the pandemic has made all of us appreciate our time together even more. I am grateful for my family and our continued health and safety.

I am EXTREMELY grateful for April 10, 2020. That’s the day Stacy and I were married!  While we were originally prepared to have our wedding on April 17, we quickly postponed it to October 3 once the virus became a pandemic. A few weeks later, the pandemic brought about even more uncertainty into our lives so we decided to push up our wedding date and spontaneously tie the knot via Zoom. It was a beautiful day and we had a lovely small ceremony in our front yard. I was grateful that we were able to have a large number of friends and family Zoom in to witness our unity. I am grateful that my good friend David Eccles offered to serve as our officiant and help make our ceremony extra special. While we were saddened that we could not have the reception/celebration we wanted, we are still hopeful that we will be able to celebrate this on our one year anniversary in 2021. Time will tell, but we are excited for when that day finally arrives!  

So, while 2020 has been attributed to a lot of negativity, the anniversary of our marriage is one day I will remember and be able to celebrate forever. I am so fortunate to have Stacy in my life — she is a person who is tremendously kind, caring, selfless, and supportive. She is an incredible stem-mom to our boys and we all cherish her more than she knows. 

Family is not an important thing, it's everything

School/Work

The school year started out 100 percent virtual and I feel my district did a really good job of transitioning students in to face to face (F2F) learning. Students and parents have a choice to remain remote or come to school F2F. Currently, I see only a fraction of my students F2F — just about 15% of them decided to return. The sizes of my F2F classes range from just 2 students to my largest class of 7. This is extremely difficult for me and my students, as we are used to 30-50 students per class! I miss my students greatly. Their absence and the lack of spontaneous music-making has had a dramatic impact on my overall happiness at school. I am, however, extremely grateful for the students I do have in class and have really enjoyed getting to know them on a more personal level. Regularly I worry that I am not able to give my students my absolute best and that I’m unable to provide the experience that they want and need. Just before this Thanksgiving break, I received some really kind notes from several of my students. Those sincere notes of kindness really mean the world to me and keep me going. They reassure me that I am making a difference, even though some days it feels like I am not. I am honestly doing my best and putting in as much effort as I can. I am trying to be optimistic about the future and the hope that we will be able to unite and play together again sometime next semester.

I worry greatly about my students who are home learning remotely. I know many of them are struggling with school and staying organized.  I know many don’t have the opportunity to be social. I know many of them are taking shortcuts to do their assignments or cheating on tests because they have the power of the internet at their fingertips. I fear that remote learning is breeding a new level of laziness and apathy with our youth and having a drastic, negative impact on their mental health. Also, there are so many distractions that prevent students from focusing. I just hope we can get students back to normal soon so all of this does not become a life-long habit. 

As an adult, I can’t really fully comprehend how difficult it must be for a child or young adult to cope with being quarantined. I know that some of my students have lost all motivation and some are simply making the choice not to actively participate in class. All I can do is continuously remind them daily how much I care, do my best to motivate them, and set a good example. I try to encourage them to go outside, stay active, and be healthy both physically and mentally. I remind them that good physical and mental health are closely correlated. I have been extremely understanding and empathetic with my students, knowing that some may be in very difficult circumstances personally, socially, financially, etc. Some of my star students have not done well during remote learning and it’s disheartening to see the degradation of their drive, motivation, and attention to detail. 

My good friend, Scott Liard, who also teaches high school orchestra, wrote a public letter to his students on his blog. I could essentially replicate his letter, change the school name references, and it would tell my students exactly how I feel. (Thank you, Scott!)  So I will sum it up…  To my students: Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your life. I appreciate you and care about you. I am sorry you are being forced into such a difficult scenario. You don’t deserve it but I know we can get through this together. I’m doing my best and I am here for you. 

I know many educators feel the way I do, but I also know that some are in different situations. Some teachers have large classes of F2F students. This situation may cause teachers to be afraid of becoming infected, cause them to feel helpless, or even make them quit teaching altogether. I worry about the future of the teaching profession.

I am grateful for my amazing colleagues at Alpharetta High School and in Fulton County who have been absolutely incredible throughout this time. While we haven’t had a F2F faculty meeting, you can feel the unity and sincerity of both faculty and administration even via Microsoft Teams! The care and support I have witnessed coming from my administration and colleagues have been incredible. It is an honor to be able to work and grow with such a fantastic group of people and I just love how we are all there for each other!!  Thank you, friends!!

Hope for Unity

The events that have unfolded this year, including the recent election have been so dividing for our country and, unfortunately, have distanced me from some people in my life, including those that I love and will continue to love. This makes me very sad. I do my best to remain respectful, neutral, and non-confrontational when it comes to events, politics, affiliations, etc., although I have not been perfect. I am concerned about how the division will impact social circles, families, and our nation as a whole going forward. It is my hope that we will all be able to begin being civil, accepting, and respectful toward one another to allow for unity. Unity makes us all stronger and happier. Easier said than done, I know. 

I see a lot of anger, hate, and negative energy being thrown around on social media. I see a lot of fake news and people spreading it to support the agenda that they want to believe is correct, even if there is no evidence. As an academic, I believe in reason, science, and research-based practices. I make every effort to read balanced news and try to look at both sides before making my decisions. I try to be mindful, respect others, and keep my business to myself. Again, I’ve made mistakes and have owned up to them.

Regardless of who wins/loses this election or any election, the world will continue to spin and life will move on. You are in charge of your life, not anyone else. Only you can make choices that determine the outcome of your life and choices that determine your happiness. Believing this is not being naive, “in denial,” or “living in a fantasy world,” it is about creating the world that you want to create through positive thinking, perspective gratitude, hope, and optimism.

I understand that all of this may be easy for me to say and do. It’s not. My life hasn’t been all roses. I haven’t always won every battle I’ve faced. I’ve had to work hard and fight to overcome adversity and other internal and external barriers that have been in my way. I still do. But I feel that it is important to continue to carry myself in a positive manner, be a good role model, and care about others through genuine sincerity and empathy. Everyone has their own story to tell.

Determined Optimism

I was deeply inspired by an article in People magazine interviewing Michael J. Fox, one of my favorite actors who played the legendary Marty McFly in my favorite movie of all time, Back to the Future. As most of you know, Michael has been fighting Parkinson’s disease for a long time and had several other difficult, life-altering events happen to him. Despite all of his obstacles and hurdles, Michael talks about how he still loves his life and about he can stay optimistic, regardless of what has happened or what will/could happen. He describes it as “determined optimism.” He states that optimism is rooted in gratitude and that it is only sustainable when you continuously refer back to gratitude. When something bad happens, you should seek out what you are grateful for and that will allow for optimism. The last step is acceptance — you move on and keep going.

I encourage you to reject the negativity in your lives. Distance yourself from those who demonstrate hypocrisy, jealousy, anger, and spite. These people and their emotions can be the kryptonite that prevents you from staying positive and optimistic. As I look ahead to the winter, the pandemic is running wild and worse now than ever. I have faith that an end is coming and life will someday be “back to normal.” Until then continue to be grateful for everything you can and it will help you to stay positive and be optimistic about the future.

I wish you all a wonderful Thanksgiving and holiday season! Peace and joy!

Charles

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Choosing to be Happy

I’ve taken some time to myself this weekend to reflect on my life and it’s amazing what some time will do. Three years ago I was forced to start a new life journey after being left on my own. It was not easy. I had been betrayed and abandoned by a person who vowed to stick with me through thick and thin. This time in my life was particularly difficult because I knew that it meant it would reduce the time I was able to spend with my boys and would change our family relationship.

I totally agree with the quote, “I believe that sometimes the bad times in our life put us on a direct path to the very best times in our life.” This has proven true in just about every negative impact in my life. As I have mentioned on this blog previously, I used my mother’s passing as a catalyst to help provide clear direction and purpose to a career path that I absolutely love. Along with lots of dedication and hard work, I have excelled in my profession for over 24 years and don’t foresee any change in my passion for teaching. Fast forward to today, and in particular, the past twelve to eighteen months.

I am now truly happy and have so much joy in my life both at home and at work. I have my health and my family is healthy. I have two growing boys who continuously amaze me with their smarts, their love, and their wit. While I do not get to see them every day, I cherish the time that I have with them and try to provide a positive home where they learn, play, and will become awesome young adults.

For two years now, I have an incredible companion, Stacy, who is kind, fun, loving, and teaches me a lot about being a great human, father, and friend. Relationships are not easy and each person must continuously give and take to make it work. I think we have attained a great balance and we continue to enjoy each other’s company more and more. In a healthy relationship, good communication is one of the main ingredients and this is a huge factor in our success. Stacy is also an amazing parent figure for the boys and loves them as if they were her own. The boys have really taken to her and love having her as an integral part of our family. I am so grateful for Stacy and all of her amazing qualities — love, strength, compassion, persistence. We are one and make each other better and stronger.

Do I have life completely figured out? Hardly! Is my life perfect? No way. There isn’t such a thing. I always feel like I am a bit backed up with school work, the house is sometimes messy, I’m a few pounds heavier than I’d like to be, my car hasn’t been washed, I don’t have enough time to complete projects, etc. etc. Who cares?? I am in a wonderful place in my life and make an honest effort to appreciate each day. I am grateful for all that I have and the opportunities I am afforded.

There are always going to be ups and downs in life, and this is normal. Everyone has to work at it. And we must choose to be happy – nothing will make you happy, at least not genuinely. I understand that there will be times of stress and negativity that will arise in the future but I can’t let that determine how I am today. I will remain open-minded, positive, vigilant and prepared to deal with problems when they arise.

Finally, I strive to live my life using the Seven Cardinal Rules, as listed below. Here’s to continued gratitude, love, peace, joy, and positivity!

Seven Cardinal Rules of Life

  1. Make peace with your past so it won’t disturb your present.
  2. What other people think of you is none of your business.
  3. Time heals almost everything. Give it time.
  4. No one is in charge of your happiness, except you.
  5. Don’t compare your life to others and don’t just them. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
  6. Stop thinking too much. It’s alright not to know the answers. They will come to you when you least expect it.
  7. Smile. You don’t own all the problems in the world.
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Reflecting on some of my core values

On a regular basis, and particularly at every major life-changing event, I find it beneficial to take some time to reflect and think about how I can make my life better and how I can work to become a stronger person. I want to be my very best for myself, my two amazing boys, my friends and family, and my students.

Full disclaimer: This blog post is not meant to be a sermon, but rather a way for me to share some of the things I value. I acknowledge the mistakes I’ve made and understand that I will I never be “perfect.”  After all, I am human!  But I am continuously trying to improve to make the best choices for my life so that I can do the “right thing.”  I strongly believe in karma, and know that it has come back to bite me after I have made a bad choice. Sometimes karma happens instantly, but other times it takes a while. Sooner or later your poor choices will catch up with you!

Below are some core values of which I feel strongly.  Core values should guide our behaviors, decisions, and action in life. When you understand what you value, you can live in accord with those values. This can lead to greater fulfillment and, ultimately, joy. I hope my list may help you think about what you value. These are in no particular order…

1. Honesty

I want to be honest and open with my friends, family, colleagues and loved ones. Honesty truly is the best policy! Lying, cheating, and being deceptive are evil and will only bring bad karma, regardless of how big or small.

2. Kindness

I want to be a kind person and treat all people with respect, particularly with those who I may not always agree with.  Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs and opinions.  I hope to treat others as I would like to be treated.

3. Passion

I aim to be passionate about my life and work. In my career, I work hard and strive to be good at what I do.   Please remember that if your job always feels like work, then you are in the wrong profession. Find something else to do!

4. Positivity

I try to associate with only good people! I avoid being around negative people who bring me down.  If I must be around negative people, I limit my interactions as much as possible.  Associating oneself with good people will help you carry only the most positive vibes.

5. Ethical

As a father and educator I want to set the example for my children and my students by making good personal and professional choices. While I’m not especially religious, I feel that being ethics are extremely important. Being ethical is a strong indicator of who you really are.

6. Persistence

It’s not always easy  to find the right solution, but giving things time and being persistent will allow you to solve problems. While it may be easier to run away from from your problems, don’t. I don’t ever give up and make it a point to stay focused and on my chosen path!

7. Empathy 

Being more empathetic is something that has helped me become a much better person.  Try putting yourself in someone else’s shoes and think about how your choices and actions will impact other people.  It is important to note, however, that you must first take care of yourself in order to be able to take care of others.

8. Gratitude

As mentioned in my previous post, I am extremely grateful for my life and everyone in it.  Even though my life has been far from “perfect,” I wouldn’t change a thing. Everything happens for a reason.

9. Communication

I feel that strong communication is a prerequisite for any successful friendship or relationship.  When people fail to communicate openly and honestly, the relationship is doomed.  Be open and honest with whom you interact.

10. Responsibility

Responsibility comes in many forms.  I strive to be an outstanding father, homemaker, teacher, coach, and friend.  This takes a lot of personal responsibility. I make sure to take responsibility for my actions and don’t blame others for my problems and mistakes! Everyone makes mistakes throughout their life — some big, some small, it’s important to continually self reflect and fess up to your mistakes.  When you’ve made a mistake, own up to it then do all you can to make it right!

Things I try to avoid:

Jealousy

Please don’t be jealous of other’s personal or professional successes. Instead offer congratulations and choose to create a learning experience from those that have been successful.  Also, stop being jealous of other’s material possessions.  It really doesn’t matter what brands you wear, what kind of car you drive, and how others see you.  It’s not about status or keeping up with the Joneses!!

Not Following Through

When you agree to something, follow through. Nobody likes a wishy-washy person. People who don’t follow through lose the trust and respect of others.

A Sense of Entitlement

A sense of entitlement means that someone thinks they deserve certain privileges. WRONG! Be accountable for your actions and stop carrying a sense of entitlement. Nobody owes you anything! If you want something, earn it by working for it. It is unfortunate how may people today feel they are owed something. Stop complaining, take action, and do something.

“If you compromise your core values, you go nowhere.”
― Roy T. Bennett

Thanks for reading!  Again, I’m not here to “preach,” but I just wanted to put out there some of the things that I value. If some of these values hit home for you, please feel free to leave a comment. Sending my best to you all!

Check out this great resource for a list of core values. http://www.threadsculture.com/blog/company-culture/core-values-list-threads/

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Gratitude

 

It has been some time since my last post and a lot has changed in my life both personally and professionally. Many changes have been for better, however there have been other changes that truly challenged me and were not always the easiest to accept. Changes are often influenced by choices you make for yourself, but sometimes changes simply happen by coincidence or are due to decisions made by others. When life circumstances change, you simply must deal with them and figure out what to do next.

Regardless of how difficult things may seem or unfair life may feel, I try to take a step back and reaffirm the things for which I am grateful. I always come to the realization that my problems are minuscule in the big picture of life and compared to what many other people endure. I have a great life and have been blessed with so much.

grat·i·tude
the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.

 

First and foremost, I am grateful for all of the people in my life — my family, friends, and colleagues. The people we are have in our lives are irreplaceable and we must keep them as our top priority. I am writing this post to show our appreciation for the people in my life. I want to sincerely thank everyone who has been a part of my life, regardless of how big or small.

“We must find time to stop and thank the people who make a difference in our lives.”
― John F. Kennedy

I’m most grateful for my two sons. My boys are everything to me! I feel fortunate because all they are healthy, physically and emotionally. They bring me joy unlike I have ever experienced in my life.  And, full disclosure, I am not saying that my boys are perfect angels – they are kids after all. And they are 110% boys!! But, I appreciate how my boys challenge me in so many different ways — helping make me more apathetic, understanding, patient, and allowing me to be a better person overall. It’s remarkable how they continuously surprise me with their kind thoughts and love.  They are wild, crazy little boys and I love them.

I am grateful to have a home that provides me and my boys with a great place to live, play, and enjoy. I am grateful to have a job that allows me to provide for my family so that I can live comfortably.  My teaching position at Alpharetta High School is especially rewarding because of my wonderful students and families, a friendly work environment, the generous support from my colleagues and administration, and the high level of music making I get to do on a daily basis.

Through persistence and hard work, I have been rewarded with an enjoyable and successful career teaching orchestra, performing, and conducting.  I feel fortunate to have taught, presented, and conducted orchestras in many places across the nation. These diverse experiences allowed me to witness different cultures, lifestyles, philosophies, and teachings.  I am grateful to have had the opportunity to work with and learn from some of the best pedagogues and orchestra teachers in the country.  Of course, each time I moved on to a new location,  my least favorite part was leaving great people. I dearly miss so many people, but I feel fortunate to have been able to keep in touch with most of them and I sincerely appreciate every friend I’ve met on this incredible journey.

I’ve been provided several unique career opportunities and am grateful for.  Sometimes I feel that perhaps I was just in the right place at the right time and that I am not deserving of the opportunities I’ve been afforded. I cherish the experiences I’ve had in each place I have lived and worked.

I am thankful and grateful for each and every day and want be sure to not take anything for granted. Life is so short and there are still so many good things to experience.

“Be mindful. Be grateful. Be positive. Be true. Be kind.”
― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart

Peace to each of you, and I hope to see you soon.  Thanks for your continued support!  I write this post with utmost gratitude.

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Against the Odds: Overcoming Adversity

momandmeSometimes a single experience or event can completely alter the outcome of your life. Fortunately, or unfortunately, I had experience as a child that unquestionably completely changed my life. Thirty years ago today my mother committed suicide. I was just shy of turning 12 years old and my world was turned upside down.

My recollections of the specifics of July 15, 1986 are somewhat vague, but I do remember that it was a usual summer day. I remember riding my bike home from the local public swimming pool, along with my sister and cousin, only to arrive to my father who had an extremely somber look on his face. I didn’t know what was wrong, but I could tell it was something critical. Holding back his emotions the best he could, my father explained to us what had happened and we all broke down crying. The last thing I remember of that day is that I decided to take a long walk alone in the woods. The emotions that went through my head included sadness, fear, anger, and remorse. I had so many questions, many of which will never be answered.

For many years my mother’s death split my family apart and the slightest mention of my mother and her death started everyone crying. For me, the topic was taboo. I didn’t like to talk about it. Members of my family tried to point fingers and blame someone for what happened. There was a lot of anger and bitterness. Mainly though, everyone was very sad and the grieving period lasted a long time. My mother was an important part of her family, particularly when she was growing up. She was the oldest of five children and often served as a “second mother” and role model to her siblings. I remember her being thoughtful, loving, witty, and extremely intelligent. She was also a wonderful cook!

Growing up, I don’t think too many people outside of my family knew about what had happened. If they did, it wasn’t really brought up. In the 80’s, things were not as open as they are today. I sometimes felt that people would judge me if they knew what had happened, so I didn’t speak of it. I kept so much inside. I was never offered any type of counseling after this traumatic event and essentially coped with things on my own. As an adolescent, this was an extremely difficult task. In fact, the trauma disturbed me for a very long time and made an impact on the choices I made and how I dealt with different situations. After attending my very first counseling session just last November, I realized what a huge mistake I had been making by not seeing someone much earlier. I was carrying a huge amount of weight on my shoulders for nearly 30 years! I previously thought to myself that I would be a weak person if I sought out help. The truth is that everyone has moments when they are down however we shouldn’t be afraid to admit it and seek help from others, if necessary.

In my last blog post I discussed my internal mental drive to attempt to rise to “the top” of my profession. It may seem a bit strange, but I owe a majority of my professional drive to the loss of my mother. From the time she died, I vowed that I would be different. I asserted that I would be successful and overcome the odds that were then placed against me. (I didn’t as many of the musical opportunities growing up that my fellow colleagues had.)

In high school I worked to keep up my grades while holding a part time job and participating in some extra curricular activities like the Mentor Mannheim Orchestra. I practiced (not enough), and really wanted to take private lessons, which I did start when I was nearly 14. My father supported me, but there wasn’t really too much of a demand to hold high academic standards or be successful in school. I just made sure I was going to school, being prepared, doing my homework, etc. because I wanted to. I was never a straight A student, but did what I had to do. When I made up my mind to pursue music, again my father supported me, but the reality of actually making it happen was up to me.

“Life doesn’t get easier or more forgiving, we get stronger and more resilient.”
― Steve Maraboli, from “Life, the Truth, and Being Free”

The loss of my mother has stirred many emotions and caused lots of different behaviors over the years. I experienced anger, frustration, anxiety, fear, loneliness, shame, resentment, and depression. However, on the positive side, I feel that I have been able to make the best out of the cards I have been dealt. I was forced to be more courageous, outgoing, dedicated, caring, and, most of all, grateful for what I have. I am extremely appreciative of the experiences I have been afforded.

“Gratitude is the single most important ingredient to living a successful and fulfilled life.”

I often wonder how much different would my life be if my mother were alive. How would I have turned out? Who would I be? Would I have a family? What would I be doing? My guess is that if my mother were alive, I would not have made the same life for myself. So, in many ways, I owe my mother more than I realize. While I wish that she were here today, (particularly to see my amazing boys!) I am thankful for my life. I’m always looking forward to the future, because best is still yet to come!

“It’s your reaction to adversity, not the adversity itself that determines how your life’s story will develop” – Dieter F. Achtdorf

In closing, I would just like to say that it is crucial to cherish the time you have with your loved ones. Quality time can’t be taken for granted because our time is limited. There are never guarantees. Always make relationships with family and friends your first priority. And if life throws you for a loop and things aren’t right, talk to a friend or seek counseling as soon as possible. Don’t be afraid to discuss your feelings and definitely don’t hold your feelings inside.

“Life is so ironic. It takes sadness to know happiness, noise to appreciate silence, and absence to value presence.”

RIP, Mom, and thank you.

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Success: Is it about getting to “the top” or just being happy?

successThroughout my career, I have always kept my eyes open for ways to advance in my profession. I’ve loved just about every teaching position I have been in, but no matter how great the situation, I always felt like I need to go higher with the next big job and the next degree. I had to get to “the top.” I had to be the best I could be. My drive to get to the top was so strong that I became disoriented and eventually lost focus of what I loved doing most. In addition, it put additional stress on myself, and had negative impacts on my family.

What exactly is “the top?”

In the teaching world, I often hear people say, “Oh, you are moving up from teaching middle school to teaching high school? That’s awesome!” Moving up??? Really??  After I won a tenure-track position to teach college full time, I thought to myself that I had finally made it. Unfortunately, there is a mentality in the field of education that often associates your “rank” or “importance” with the level of your students. How wrong this is!! The top is where you are happiest.

How do you really get to “the top?”

This fall, I’m moving “down” from the ivory towers of collegiate-level teaching and will go back to directing a high school orchestra program. I don’t consider this a move down at all because I’m finally making a move for the real me and will be going back to do what I love to do most. Simply put: I’m happiest when I’m working with kids in the schools. (In addition, this new position will have many positive implications for my family, which is of utmost importance!)

Success is an iceberg…

For the last four years I served as a tenure-track Assistant Professor of Music Education at Kennesaw State University.  I was hired on to be the first string education professor and things went extremely well. I worked to increase student enrollment in string music education and helped make KSU the largest undergraduate string education program in the state Georgia. I connected with school orchestras and the community by directing a large number of outreach events and conducted an orchestra for the Georgia Youth Symphony Orchestra. I collaborated with my colleagues, developed new courses, refreshed old courses, served on committees, and endured some major changes in the music education curriculum and student teacher assessment. I made positive relationships with my students and felt their enthusiasm, energy, and pride. In addition to the work at the local level, I increased visibility to KSU and the School of Music by leading dozens of orchestra clinics, presenting at numerous conferences, conducting honor/all-state orchestras, and even presenting some research. The invitations just kept coming! My yearly reviews were stellar and I was well on my way to becoming a tenured Associate Professor. Success!! But even with all of the positive accolades and subsequent notoriety, I wasn’t truly happy. I never felt completely fulfilled.  Something was missing.

(KSU Rocks, BTW)

I do want to publicly acknowledge the sheer awesomeness that is Kennesaw State University (KSU)!!  It is an incredible institution with marvelous faculty and students and a great place to work, learn, and grow. It is THE university (and School of Music!) to be at in Georgia and is quickly gaining a solid reputation at the regional and national levels. I could go on and on about how great a place KSU is. I will dearly miss my colleagues and am thankful that we will always remain friends. In addition, I will forever be a fan, advocate, and supporter of KSU and always an Owl at heart. GO OWLS!!!

Be thankful for every day

Starting in the 10th grade, my dream job was to be a high school orchestra director. (Thank you Mr. Curtis Petersen!!) I started teaching in the public schools in 1996 and had unique experiences teaching wonderful students in Nevada, Florida, and Ohio. Some of the fondest memories of my career were during the times when I was teaching middle school and high school orchestra. Unfortunately, I took some of these experiences for granted and didn’t always realize how great I had it. For a number of different personal and professional reasons, I was always looking to get to that next level “up.”

“Life is what happens to you when you’re busy making other plans.” — John Lennon

If you keep an open mind and are willing to make changes, life can take you places you never expected. I don’t regret any of the career changes I’ve made. Each place I have worked there were memorable experiences. Most importantly, along the way I met awesome people and developed so many positive relationships with my students and colleagues. These relationships have helped define my career and my life in ways I can hardly explain.  To all of my friends, colleagues, and former students:  THANK YOU!

If you ever question yourself and where you are, is very important to stop and smell the roses. It’s cliché, but it’s true: The grass is not always greener on the other side. But, unfortunately sometimes you have to experience alternatives to fully comprehend this. On the other end of the spectrum, if you don’t take any risks you’ll never know what you are missing! Decisions can be so difficult.

“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.” – Confucius

No matter what, remember that being at “the top” is being (and staying) where you are happiest, not where you think you should be or where others see you. If you are unsure, dig down deep and follow your heart.

 

“Watching The Wheels” by John Lennon

(Listen on Apple Music)

People say I’m crazy doing what I’m doing,

Well they give me all kinds of warnings to save me from ruin,

When I say that I’m o.k. they look at me kind of strange,

Surely your not happy now you no longer play the game,

 

People say I’m lazy dreaming my life away,

Well they give me all kinds of advice designed to enlighten me,

When I tell that I’m doing fine watching shadows on the wall,

Don’t you miss the big time boy you’re no longer on the ball?

 

I’m just sitting here watching the wheels go round and round,

I really love to watch them roll,

No longer riding on the merry-go-round,

I just had to let it go,

 

People asking questions lost in confusion,

Well I tell them there’s no problem,

Only solutions,

Well they shake their heads and they look at me as if I’ve lost my mind,

I tell them there’s no hurry…

I’m just sitting here doing time,

 

I’m just sitting here watching the wheels go round and round,

I really love to watch them roll,

No longer riding on the merry-go-round,

I just had to let it go.

 

Wishing everyone a safe and enjoyable summer break! 🙂

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Setting Personal and Professional Goals

It’s hard to believe that December is already upon us!  I am extremely thankful for the week-long Thanksgiving break.  It was nice to spend a lot of quality time with my family and also take a few moments for myself.

November was a busy month. On the 17th, I had the opportunity to perform solo alongside three of my amazing colleagues (Helen Kim, Justin Bruns, and Kenn Wagner) who are world-class performing violinists and are some of the top players in the area. For over a year Kenn had been asking me to perform with him (accompanied by my university orchestra). I simply could not do it last school year because I was so bogged down with trying to complete my dissertation, however this year there were no excuses!


It was decided that we would perform Vivaldi’s Concerto for Four Violins in B Minor. This was my first real solo opportunity with an orchestra, and I knew the level of performance would be extremely high given the company, so I was quite nervous.  Luckily my colleagues are kind, amazing, and supportive people.  They provided a comfortable environment in which to play. They were especially patient and helpful with my all-campus university orchestra that consists of mostly non-music majors. My students and I feel so fortunate that these incredible violinists were willing to share their talents and perform with us.  I know this sort of opportunity doesn’t happen everywhere!

“I feel that it is important for our students to know that we are musicians who can still perform.”

Performing as a soloist definitely put me out of my comfort zone, however it helped rejuvenate an emphasis on performing by forcing me to focus on my instrument. I really miss performing and haven’t done very much since moving to Georgia. The hustle and bustle of a new job, presenting, conducting, a dissertation, and a busy family life didn’t allow me the time to dedicate to my instrument. November’s performance opportunity really helped bring me back! This fall I have been quite diligent about practicing and it felt really great to regain the musical bond with my instrument. I’m going to make it a goal to continue to practice as often as I can.  Scheduling the time to practice is the key to actually making practice a reality. In our busy professional lives as teachers, it is easy to let practicing go. Modeling and playing along with my orchestra is not a substitute for true, dedicated practice.  I feel that it is important for our students to know that we are musicians who can still perform.

Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young.” 
― Henry Ford

Away from the music field, I’ve also pursued a personal fitness goal – to complete a half marathon (13.1 miles). In the past I’ve done several races such as the 5K, 10K, and even a 15K, but the half marathon was a fairly big difference. Over the past several years, I’ve enjoyed staying fit by doing some running. I should note that I have not always been a “runner.” In high school, I could barely run a mile! I have found that running has helped me deal with stress and improves my physical and emotional wellness.

With the support and encouragement of my wife, she signed both of us up for the “Triple Peach” through the Atlanta Track Club.  The Triple Peach is a three race series beginning with the Peachtree Road Race on the 4th of July, the Atlanta 10 Miler in October, and concludes with the Atlanta Half Marathon on Thanksgiving. I am now proud to say that I’ve done the Triple Peach with the completion of my first half marathon on Thanksgiving morning! Attaining this goal was not easy. I don’t love running, but I do love how i feel when I’m done. Sometimes in the middle of a long run I really hate it, but once I’m done I feel amazing and I realize that the effort was all worth it. Running is definitely mind over matter!

In life, we have our ups and downs.  But it is how we handle the events in our lives that really matter.  I feel like I endured a great deal in my lifetime and am finally coming to peace with many of the things that used to bother me. I’ve let go of negativity and the little (non important) things and am only focusing on what really matters.  I’m extremely thankful for my incredible wife and beautiful boys and am also grateful for the professional opportunities that continue to fall into place.

rocky

As educators we must continue to learn and also set goals for ourselves, no matter how big or small. It is essential that we strive to push through adversity and become our best. There are no limits.